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The Tall Diaries

The Tall Diaries.... Enjoy

Dear Diary (22)

I just watched an episode of dancing with the stars... apparently I am either really out of touch with pop culture, or they are getting people on the show who aren't really "stars" anymore. (I'm probably out of touch) Anyway, there is a girl on there who is 6 ft tall and it was mentioned a few times just how tall she is.. bla bla bla.. 

And then I thought about what it would be like if I was on dancing with the stars, wearing heels. 

I would have to "be the guy" and do his role and he'd have to be the woman. 

hahaha, can you imagine?!

I will laugh about this all day 

Dear Diary (21)
I'm a pretty cuddly person. In fact I think it is safe to say that in my family I am the most cuddly. I will always take a hug...Well almost always.

 There I am minding my own business, standing in line at Starbucks when I am embraced from behind.

 I froze, then thought it must be a friend playing a joke, then froze when I turned around and realized I didn't know the woman.

 WHAT IN THE WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 Me: Can I help you?
 Her: It is SO good to see another tall woman around. Isn't it just a challenge sometimes?
 Me: Well, usually No, right now, Yes!
 Her: Oh, did that bother you?
 Me: Well, it wasn't really my favorite. 

  I am still befuddled. I did get free coffee out of it.... they felt bad for me.

  My co-worker and I were able to laugh pretty hard about it. 

Dear Diary (20)

After today I almost want to take back my previous post. It seems that I am not intimidating to people, quite the contrary. I make friends pretty much everywhere I go, or at least people make me their friend... if that makes sense. 

Kyle so sweetly gave me a free movie ticket, I also had a coupon for a free small popcorn. I decided today was a great day to go see a movie; so did a couple of sweet elderly people.

As soon as I got in line to buy my ticket a old man spotted me out. He kept staring at me. I knew as soon as he bought his ticket he would make his way over and talk to me. He did. We talked about sports. He asked what I thought of his March Madness Bracket. (He picked Louisville to go all the way.. I told him I thought Kentucky would take the crown, although I love how Louisville is a defensive team.) 

I went to get my free popcorn. He came with me. I got napkins. He followed. I started to walk towards my theater. He decided to escort me, literally right up to the hallway of the theater, then decided to go see his own movie. 

I walked to the very top, found a secluded seat. (which wasn't hard to do since it was a matinee on a week day.) Well I wasn't secluded for long. A sweet 80 year old lady came to me and said, are these seats saved? They weren't and so she joined me. Well she started about 4 seats away and within a minute had moved to sit next to me. She noticed my long legs and wanted to talk about how she was also tall, and that her family was tall... and then she told me her family's heritage. They are from Norway, although her husband's family is from Sweden and so her children are mixed. They do have a set of twins in the family that is short. They were premature babies and had survived a very difficult pregnancy. The twins are now 58 I think.

She asked about my husband, my life, patted my arms several times and at one point held my hand as she showed me pictures of her late husband. They were married for 60 years. A picture of them on their 50th wedding anniversary is her background picture on her phone. 

She told me that she could tell Kyle and I were built of the stuff to make marriage last. She said it was good I'm a church goer because that's half the battle of a good marriage. I invited her to my church, we'll see if she comes. She also told me that I was a happy person (It's hard not to smile when an old lady is treating you as I was being treated) and that happy people have good marriages. I thought of a line from legally blond when she said that. ("Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don't shoot their husbands, they just don't. )

Oh, and she doesn't like the twilight movies. 

So much for being intimidating.
Dear Diary (19)

I have a built in "intimidation factor" due to being tall. I kind of forget about it, because I do NOT see my self as an intimidating person, quite the opposite really. People tend to think I'm in some kind of position of authority, even though I'm not, and strangers don't really question me.

 For example, we were in line for the Hunger Games with friends last night. They were checking EVERYONE'S ticket stubs to make sure no one was sneaking in the movie. I walked through the ticket booth without showing my ticket, went to the concessions and then walked into the movie without once showing my ticket to anyone. 

I'm kind of temped to do an experiment. I think when I'm in town I'll do some slightly suspicious things and see if anyone actually questions me... how far does my "intimidation" really factor? 

Dear Diary (18)

 At church on Sunday a little girl stood right in my path, put her hands on her hips and said: "Your HUGE!"

I know I had a conversation with her, but my mind really floated back in time to high school. I had a friend who heard people say that to me one too many times. So what did she do? She made me a shirt that had my height on the back.

Her logic was that people just stare at me when they walk past me, but once they are past me they quickly whip their heads around to stare at how tall I am. She figured that if my height was on the back of my shirt people might leave me alone and walk away satisfied. 

She couldn't have been more right. People did flip around to stare and almost immediately we would hear things like:

"she really is that tall!"
"look! her height is on her shirt!"
"I'm totally right, you owe me, I won the bet"

It was a great summer of people not bothering me quite as much as usual, but then I grew and the shirt was no longer true. 

Dear Diary (17)

I grew up in a home filled with music and dancing. 
This dancing usually took place in the kitchen, which is perfectly normal because all dancing should take place in the kitchen, right?

Well an oldie came on and I couldn't help but jump up to dance. 

Do you know that dance move, the one where you put one hand behind your head, the other holding your ankle, and then you pull your leg up to your head.

The one that makes you look crazy and is usually performed by strange men at weddings?

Well I decided that was the dance move for me. I was pulling my elbow to my knee over and over until I lost balance. 

However, instead of falling over, my legs collided with the table and my head collided with the chandelier over the table. 

My head broke the chandelier!

shattered half of the glass lamp shade.

We (my sisters and dear friend) all froze for a moment. I put my hand to my forehead to make sure it wasn't bleeding. 

Then, simultaneously we all broke into laughter. 

Only a girl 6'6'' and with no coordination at all can break a chandelier with her head.  

Dear Diary (16)
People ask me a lot what things are hard for me being tall and if I get upset or if I want to tell people off when they say thoughtless things. 

The truth is, there have been moments when I want to say something, take a deep breath and walk away, but really I've never had to defend myself. I have friends and family for that. For as many tall story I have I think I have an equally funny defensive sister or defensive friend story.

One that comes to mind happened when we first moved to Temecula. 

News of the "odd couple" (The really tall girl who married a short guy) had spread like wildfire through our church (although people didn't think Kyle and I knew about it) and the city of Temecula wasn't far behind. 

Everywhere we went someone was pointing and making comments.

My sister Debbie had come down to visit for the weekend. We went to a movie and on our way to our car after it was over we passed a group of high school kids. 

"WOW she's like an amazon woman!" -Very short boy

They continued to say a few more things.

I noticed but didn't care much and just continued to walk to the car until I realized Debbie and Kyle weren't walking with me.

I turned around. 

Oh no, they had that look on their faces. The "you don't say things like that about my sister/wife" face.

Debbie was already gone, Kyle not far behind (he only hesitated for a second because I told him to let it go)

They marched after those kids and right there in front of a restaurant with outdoor seating Debbie caught up to them.

"Which one of you said my sister was an Amazon woman?!" -Deb was fierce. 
Two girls looked at her with pure shock on their face and gave up their friend who made the comment.

"Do NOT call my sister an Amazon woman just because you have small man syndrome and are barely pushing 5'2''!" -Deb 

I don't know what else was said because I stayed behind waiting for them to come back, with a bit of a grin on my face. I've always had a team of defenders on my side.


Dear Diary (15)

Yesterday, while at work a mom came into school and started chatting with me. After just a few questions she realized I watched her son's class at lunch every day. She started chuckling lightly and said: 

"It was the funniest thing. My son came home and told us that he knows a lady that is 6'6''! His dad is 6'4'' and told my son that OBVIOUSLY it's IMPOSSIBLE for a woman to be 6'6''. Cameron (her son) tried insisting that you told him you were 6'6''. My husband told him that either he heard wrong or you weren't telling the truth. hahahahahaha!"

I wasn't really laughing. In fact I was pretty dumbfounded by this woman and her husband. OBVIOUSLY it's NOT impossible for a woman to be 6'6''. I was also a little shocked at how quickly this man dismissed both his son and I because he couldn't imagine I was that tall. I really meet the funniest people.

So, I just smiled and said (while still sitting) yes, I am 6'6''. 

Lady: "no!"
me: "yes"
Lady: "really?!"
me: "yes"
Lady: "will you stand up for me?"

I stand

Lady: "oh my.."
me: awkward silence because I am awkwardly standing for a lady who 5 seconds earlier had questioned me and couldn't believe I was telling the truth about my height.. strange to have to prove yourself to strangers and then have them gawk at you.... I slowly sit.

Lady: "well, I'm going to have to tell my husband."

me: "Ok.... well nice meeting you." 

A question has haunted me my whole life.. and after this moment I yet again pondered it... "What girl lies about being 6'6''?"

Dear Diary (14)
My sister shared a video with me today about stupid things that people say to tall girls. I laughed SO hard because I had literally heard EVERY single one of the things this girl shared, and she was a good 6 inches shorter than me. I can't share the video but I decided that I will share SOME of the phrases I have heard most in my life. I wont say that I would be a millionaire if I had a dollar for every time I had heard these saying, but I will say I would probably be pulling in 6 figures. 

I will also share what I am thinking when these things are said.

"Whoa, you can see on top of my fridge!" (thank you captain obvious)

"Can you reach that?" (sure, I don't mind that you interrupted my conversation or movie or reading or phone conversation to reach something for you. What do you do when I'm not here?)

"Can you touch the ceiling?!" (it's a 12 foot ceiling I'm 6'6'' I don't have go-go-gatchet arms)

"Watch your head!" (sadly I'm a big enough klutz that this one comes in handy at times)

"Your HUGE.... I mean not fat, but HUGE."(Wow! your insensitive... I mean.... yeah, your insensitive)

"Can I ask you something personal?" (no, I just met you, you literally didn't even say hello, why would I want to tell you something person?)

"Your a tall drink of water.. and I'm thirsty" (I'm married, your 70... I don't even know how to respond... smile and walk away awkwardly)

"you should probably sit in the back, NO ONE will be able to see" (well, the person directly behind me might not be able to see, so sure I'll go to the back, but I'm pretty sure my head isn't wide... I wont block EVERYONE's view)

"Where did you get your height?" (I bought it.. where do you think I got it?)

"If you were an animal you'd be a giraffe" (Really? is my neck the same height as my entire body?)

"Do you play basketball?" (real original)

"Do you play volleyball?" (see above)

"how do you find boys?" (I'm married, YOU'RE the single one.. really?)

" Your an extra large? but your not fat" (I usually just nod and feel pity at this point)

"Your tall... how much do you weigh" (How much do YOU weigh?! do you have any social graces?)

"can I call you amazon woman? or maybe amazon princess? or wait wait.. amazon queen!"
(sure, call me whatever you want, as long as I can call YOU whatever I want.)

"you know how there are legal midgets.. I bet your a legal Giant" (I bet your a legal____)

"Your not really 6'6'' (really? you've measured me?)

"You HAVE TO be taller than that because I'm 6'4'' (no, you have just lied about your height for the past 5 years because you have little man syndrom)

I could go on an on, and quite frankly I'm getting a little too sarcastic. Please know that while I wrote this post I was laughing.

Dear Diary (13)
Well I was in Hobby Lobby and as I was approaching the door to leave a lady started approaching me. Here's how the conversation went:

lady: I'm sure you get this all the time, but where do you find your pants?
me: honestly I do most of my pants shopping online. Gap, Banana Republic, J Crew, Nordstrom, they all have tall pants online. There are many more sites too!
lady: well do they have larger sizes? (ok ok she was a bit larger than me)
me: um, I don't know what size they go up to, but I'm sure that a couple of them do.

man comes walking up to us, I quickly find out it's the lady's husband.

man: she told you to go online too?
me: yeah, it's pretty much your best bet.
man: I like to try on my clothes
me: well they have good return policies.. so you should be fine
man: You know, you should go shopping with my wife 
lady: yeah, you could give me some good tips
me: um, ... awkward pause.... you'll do just fine alone I'm sure
man: no really would you take her shopping?
me: well I don't know you, I don't feel comfortable with that
lady: we would be fine
me: no, really I don't think so.
man: Come on we "Hobby Lobby" together
me: (I didn't now hobby lobby was a verb) We don't really "Hobby Lobby" together, we were just here at the same time. Sorry I'm really going to insist that we don't shop together.

Dear Diary (12)
I will first set the scene for you. There is a long line in the grocery story, actually there were multiple long lines, every checkout stand was full. 

I waited patiently in line; pretending not to notice the many stares and loud comments on my height. 

I finally made it to the front of the line. However, the lady who was SUPPOSED  to be checking me out was on the little phone that they use at the check stands to page one another.. 

She had been paged by the checker in aisle one to find out how tall I was because he had a bet going with the man he was checking out. 

Yes, it's true. The checker won the bet and the man actually paid up. 

I have said it MANY times, but I am sure that one day I will find a way to make money by just being tall

Dear Diary (11)

I probably should have shared this story in October, but for some reason I thought about it today. I was trick-or-treating with my younger sister, and some friends one Halloween when we arrived at the door of a friendly neighbor, or so I thought. 

I was dressed as a ghost. It was a very smart costume. I was able to be completely bundled under my white sheet, which suited me just fine. Octobers in Montana get COLD. Anyway, due to the fact that you couldn't see my face, you could only see how tall I was, the man who answered the door wouldn't give me any candy because he told me I was too old to be trick-or-treating and to grow up. I was 10. 

It's amazing to me how many people associate height and age. When the day comes that kids come to my door for trick-or-treating, I'm giving one piece to everyone and a ton to the tallest kid in the group, not the cute little petite kid, the kid who is awkwardly tall and hasn't quite figured out what to do with their super long limbs yet. 

Dear Diary (10)

Things happen to me because I'm tall that truly don't happen to anyone else. 

For instance: I was on the swim team for about 11 years, for those 11 years we shared the pool during our practice time with the synchronized swimmers and a water aerobics class. 
I could almost dedicate a whole page to the water aerobic ladies. From the fact that they did their hair and make-up before they got in the pool or that we would choke on the fumes from their hairspray and perfume while we swam. 

Well these dear ladies came up to me one day in the locker room. (It's a little uncomfortable to be approached by a group of older women in baggy swim suits while your trying to change for school) They wanted to know, like so many people, where I buy my clothes. I started rattling off places and they looked at me with pity in their eyes.
Apparently I was not shopping at a place they deemed appropriate. They suggested I shop at "Elegant Legs". Yes there is a real store called Elegant legs. As if that isn't awkward enough in and of itself they gave me a catalog for it. 

I dressed quickly, "accidentally" forgot my catalog and headed for school. 

This is where it actually gets embarrassing.

On my way to school I got my head caught in a tree. I was a little distracted because I knew that the boy I had a crush on was coming from the parking lot behind me. I was so distracted that I didn't duck under a tree and got my hair caught in a branch. 

"Oh no, I have GOT to get out of this tree before Colin sees me!" I frantically thought to myself.

As I am trying to rip my hair from the tree one of the water aerobics ladies comes out of the swim center yelling to me. "Bekki Dear, you forgot your elegant legs!" 

Not to worry, she decided to bring it to me.

So, head stuck in a tree, old lady screaming about elegant legs.... wait for it.. yes, Colin walked by and got to witness the whole thing. 

English class with him was very awkward that day.

Dear Diary (9)

I have long since quit going in chronological order, but here is one from about 3 years ago. 

I was in Santa Monica with some friends, we were walking up on the side walks above the beach. There are metal cannon's up there. Not sure why, some kind of memorial probably. Anyway, my friend was sitting on one and I thought I'll go run and jump onto one with him and take a picture. 

I judged how tall the canon was by the height of my friend.

So I ran, and I jumped as high as I could... and WAY over shot. I slipped off the opposite side of the cannon taking him down with me. I landed straight on my back. Some stranger caught my head. It seems to be a theme with me. People catching my head when I fall that is.
Needless to say we attracted a lot of attention and people started taking pictures of me. 

Dear Diary (8)
Two weekends ago Kyle and I were up at our old church. It was So good to see old friends.... and in my case,  people involved in old embarrassing moments. 

There is a midget who comes up a little above my knees who attends our old church. Little Person, is that the correct term? I don't really know... not trying to offend here, oh well.

I saw her and remembered the moment we first met. It went like this..

I was walking from Big Church to Crossroads in a flood of people. (At Grace Community Church it really is a flood of people) I was focusing on things a little more eye level, when just in time I looked down. I was about to take a step, and had I done so I would have kicked this midget into the air. 

I panicked.  

Lost my balance.

And stepped OVER her.
It seemed like the thing to do... step over her instead of on her or kick her... but now..

She was under the skirt of my dress... 
I froze as she lifted my skirt and walked out and quickly away from me. 

painfully embarrassing!

Dear Diary (7)
 Being tall consistently has a couple of effects on people.

Effect 1: they suddenly believe that interrupting is not only ok, but that their question of "how tall are you" is THE most important thing to be discussed.

example: I was talking to some girls at church, we had actually formed a little circle (it was cold and rainy on Sunday, we needed warmth) A lady that I had never seen before circled our circle and then in the middle of my friends sentence she slides right in aaaaaaand.... "My goodness how tall are you?" I told her and then she left... didn't even pretend she wanted to know me.. just a curious old lady... my friend never finished her sentence. 

Effect 2: they think that even if they are standing only a couple of feet from me that because of my crazy height I MUST not be able to hear them. 

example: 2 women standing next to each other staring at me. Then while looking at me they started to bet on how tall I was. They were not whispering, they were talking in a normal tone. 

Girl 1- "I bet she's at least 6 feet tall"
Girl 2 - "Your kidding right? I'm 5'10'' she's WAY more then 6 feet tall, she's probably almost 7 feet tall"
Me - "I'm 6'6''"
Girl 1 - (giggling) "Oh my gosh she heard us!"
Girl 2 - (also giggling) "I know! so embarrassing!.... she's so tall!"
Me - Um, I can still here you. Your right in front of me.
Girl 1 - "she heard us again.. you need to learn to whisper"
Me- I walked away, kind of pitying them.. I wonder how far they will get in life being that ditsy. 

Dear Diary (6)
I am on the phone with my dear friend Hillary and it reminded me of a favorite tall story. I was in a bathroom stall (the stall comes up to  my neck) 

I was turning around to flush the toilet when the person in the stall next to me started  pounding on the stall wall and screaming at me.

"Hey you pervert get off the toilet! stop watching me!" - old lady

"um, what? sorry.. I can't see you.. not looking.. sorry" - me

"I'll get you, just you wait a second you pervert!" - old lady

I cannot see down into stall just because I am taller then them, Yes I can see over them, but just because you can see over something doesn't mean you can see down into.

Well the old lady in the stall next to me thought that because she could see me I could see her. 

She thought that I was standing on the toilet watching her..

Hillary was out of the stalls washing her hands watching all of this and DYING laughing!

I ducked and RAN out of the bathroom... 

Dear Diary (5)

There are things you can always count on in life... Death, Taxes, and the fact that I will get my picture taken when I go to Santa Monica. 
I was there with my friends one summer evening. I had a lady stop and ask if I would take my picture with her. 

She was roughly 4 foot nothing. ok, ok, she was 4'5''

We stood back to back and "click" the deed was done.

Joel, a friend who was with us thought it was HILARIOUS... someone would want to take a picture with me because I'm tall!?!?!?!?! He stole the camera and I was in trouble for the rest of the day. 

Whenever anyone stared too long Joel would ask if they wanted to take a picture (not like in elementary school when you say "take a picture it'll last longer." he was genuine.)

I had my picture snapped a LOT that night..

Then we stumbled across a basketball team. Their point guard was really short. I mean not the 4'5''er from earlier in the day, but about 5'7, wait a minute... that's how tall my husband is.

Anyways, He was fascinated by how tall I was. Asked if I would hold his hand as we walked down the side walk so that someone could take my picture and he could pretend like we were dating... I was creeped out and said no.... Joel said yes.

Then short point guard suggested we just skip and swing our arms.... he was speaking Joel's language. 
There I was, skipping with a stranger down the sidewalk in Santa Monica hand in  hand.... 

The rest of the team felt left out so we took a picture too.... 
man I look awful

Dear Diary (number 4)
I am tall, and ALWAYS have been tall. I came out tall. I wasn't a normal baby and then had a crazy growth spurt, my life (until I stopped growing my jr. year in high school) has been one long growth spurt. 

This means that I literally felt like I would go to bed being able to reach a certain distance, wake up and be able to reach another 2 inches. I'm sure that's not REALLY how much I grew, it's just what it felt like. 

This being said, I was a klutz. HUGE klutz... been to the emergency room 6 times klutz. 

2 examples of my klutziness. 

I fell a lot, but instead of my family hearing a thud and coming to find out if I was hurt this is what would happen.

"Thud" - me
"Bek, was that you?" - my dad and sisters
"Yeah" - me
"you ok?" - dad and sisters
"Yep" - me
"What happened" - d&s
"I fell" -me
"obviously, how?" - d&s
"I don't know, I was just standing and my feet flew out from under me." -me
"you weren't walking or running? you were just standing.. you fell standing?" d&s


"Ok, well um. glad your alright." d&s

During my freshman year of college I played basketball for Georgia Southern University. Granted, being the same steady height for 2 years had helped my klutziness a little... but not much. 

I was nicknamed BG. Not for Big Girl, but for Baby Giraffe, and not Baby Giraffe because I'm as tall as one, Baby Giraffe because I fell like a new born baby giraffe. 

The wobbly legs that slowly came crashing down.

I had one team member that would see me start to fall and scream 
"Get her head"

She would spring towards me when I fell, no matter where she was at on the court. She was SURE that she could reach me and break my fall before I actually hit the ground. 

Sometimes she did make it.

Dear Diary (number 3)
I've been trying to say these in chronological order, but then I got talking to a friend and remembered a funny tall story. Here it is....

I'm on a plane going home.

There was a lady in the row next to me that kept staring at me over and over and over.

When someone stares for that long you KNOW that they are building up the courage to ask you something. For me, it's usually about my height. 

Moment of truth, she leaned across the aisle and said:

"so I know that you must get this ALL  the time, but um.... are you Lisa Leslie?!"

I was shocked. No I am not usually asked if I am a Black Superstar Basketball player (also an Olympic athlete) 

"No" - me

"Oh, I get it, you don't want people to bother you. I wont say anything, you are her right?" - weird lady

"No, really. Lisa Leslie is black. That's just the first of our many differences." - me

"Wow, your really going to play this up. You want to stay under cover. Can I please just have your autograph?" -weird lady

I had a choice to make. Deny that I was Lisa Leslie again and have her pester me for the rest of the trip... oooor.... I could sign an autograph that would be worth nothing and be left alone.

"Sure, I'll sign one, do you have any paper?" -me

Lisa, if you ever find yourself stumbling upon this blog... Sorry I impersonated you.

Dear Diary (number 2)
I am thrilled THRILLED when people come up with new tall jokes, or comments, or anything about being tall I haven't heard before.. Trust me, I've heard it ALL! 

Don't ask me how the weather is up here.. it's UN-original. And really, you can't think of anything better than that? 

You are not allowed to call me a tall drink of water unless you are a male over the age of 65, but I would prefer 70. 
Anyways, this all started a long long time ago (me getting picky about the tall comments) I swam with a boy who asked me every day, multiple times a day "How's the weather up there." 

I wasn't offended because I'm tall, I was offended because I really felt like my intelligence was being mocked when he asked me EVERY DAY. Plus he was a truly annoying kid that picked on my little sister constantly.

This is how it all played out:
"Hey Bekki, how's the weather up there? hahahaha, get it?" - Matthew
"Yes matthew I get it... and the weather is same a foot above you as it is a foot below you." - Me

"Hey Bekki, how's the weather up there? hahahaha, get it?" - Matthew
"It's fine, thanks. Hey Matthew, since you ask me this EVERY day and I'm sure it's a habit by now, I will give you 2 weeks to teach yourself not to ask me that anymore, or else I will show you the weather up here." - Me

Two Weeks Later

"Hey Bekki, how's the weather up there? hahahaha, get it?" - Matthew

I spit on him  and told him it was raining.

Dear Diary (number 1)

Everyone is protected by political correctness. There are 2 exceptions to this rule: The Middle Class White male and Tall people...
I clearly fall under the latter.

One could cause a fat person a lifetime of therapy for actually calling them fat. 
Calling someone short apparently causes a complex (little-man syndrome). 
To say that Asians have an upper hand in the Laundry mat occupation is clearly offensive.
It would be considered rude to point out any obvious characteristic of a person, to that person
example: "wow, your feet look just like Frodo's"
                "You have large ears, just in case you didn't know"
If someone had a bit of work done on their bodies, well, it's clear that you wouldn't talk about it.
However, when someone see's a tall person all filters fall away, there is no sense of social do's and don'ts. 

I am living proof of this. 
I have a 25 years experience of this, so I have decided to share a bit with you on how I am treated because I am tall.

Please understand that I am sharing this mostly because I think it's funny, partially because I am still, 25 years later, surprised by the cluelessness of people.

I will start early in my life, just to give some perspective. It really started when I was 3.
My grandparents were living right outside of Washington D.C. at the time our story takes place. On the morning of the incident my older sisters decided to take their dolls on a walk. Although the prospect of staying at home with Debbie (who was just learning how to lift her head up when laying on her stomach) seemed thrilling, I really wanted to go on the walk. 

I was given permission to go! I ran to catch up with them, and no sooner had I done this, than I fell and cut my knee. My sisters debated who should take me home and settled upon a good compromise. Jess would walk me a couple of steps, point at the house,(all of the homes were brick, I didn't know where to go) and let me figure out the rest on my own.
I walked and cried and walked and cried, until I was no longer in the neighborhood but on a corner of a busy intersection.

A nice lady with brown hair saw me and took me home. No, I've never mad much fear of strangers. She asked me questions, and being 3 I answered them like a 3 year old. 

"What is your moms name?" - brown haired lady
"Mom" - me
"what is your dads name?" -bhl
"Dad" - me
"Where do you live?" - bhl
"Montana"- me

Well she looked at me. Saw how tall I was. Assumed I must be at least 5 if not 6. She thought about my answers to her questions and came up with her logical conclusion:
I MUST be a retarded 5 year old. 

And that is exactly how she reported me to the police.
Yes, my mother found me. She explained I was just tall (a little offended) and took me home.


  1. LOVE this! This made me laugh out loud... awesome. Can't wait to read more!

  2. Bek, this KILLED me!! You are SOO funny! Coming from a family of tall people, I especially loved you spitting on that kids head. So awesome! Miss you! :-)

  3. Popping over from your sis's place! Girl you are a riot!!!
    Oh 'bout forgot....'may I have your autograph?' ;)