My son hates to sleep

Jonathan will no longer fall asleep unless I hold him, and he has started waking up in the night again. 

We have tried, by our estimation, everything. 

I'm not afraid to let him cry it out in the crib. This just doesn't work. He works himself up and cries and cries and screams and you would think he'll fall asleep, but he doesn't. He does finally calm down, and then just plays in the crib until he realizes he's alone and starts to scream again. 

This week I probably won't leave my house because I will simply be trying to get his sleeping under control. Which means I won't sleep at all. 

This has made me think of all the times my mom and dad held me, sang to me, played with me, lost sleep for me, prayed for me, pleaded with the Lord that I would sleep so they could sleep, and sacrificed for my good. 

I am sure I won't ever fully know all the love I have been given. 

When Jonathan was fussy yesterday I found myself saying to him "Do not complain, you are too loved to ever complain. Mommy loves you, daddy loves you, and most importantly Jesus loves you."

I said this over and over until I heard myself say it. I was struck by it. How often the little truths we tell our children are the truths that we need. I need to not complain about my sleepless child. I am so loved. I am so blessed. The Lord has granted me a baby. It is my job to make him sleep, which is hard. However, it's also my job to make him laugh, and play with him, and watch him grow. 

I am too loved to complain. 

Ok, as I am typing this Kyle and I are in the living room of our little place listening to Jonathan scream instead of sleep... it's been 40 minutes... and Kyle say's: Man, that kid has all of our worst qualities. He does! He doesn't want to miss anything, like his dad. He is stubborn and curious like his mom. It's the trifecta of no sleep. 

Anyway, what was I saying? I am too loved to complain.

The Lord is stripping me of my impatience. One nap at a time.